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Garrison Keillor quotes

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American writer and broadcaster b.1942
Garrison Keillor quotes
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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking and all the children are above-average.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize I'm going to miss mine by just a few days”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“The funniest line in English is ''Get it?'' When you say that, everyone chortles.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Vodka is tasteless going down, but it is memorable coming up”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Powdermilk biscuits: Heavens, they're tasty and expeditious! They're made from whole wheat, to give shy persons the strength to get up and do what needs to be done”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“A compassionate conservative is someone who electrocutes juveniles but lets them have a last 'make a wish'”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Sometimes you have to look reality in the eye, and deny it.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.”

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